Let the life of this couple be a testimony that the best option is not divorce. The best option is for both people to grow up and get your "ish" together!
1. Who are we?
Donald & Brit Gibson aka Mr. G & Mrs. G
2. How did we meet?
We met in Starkville, MS while I, Mr. G, was attending Mississippi State University. It was the second semester of my freshman year. It was a big party weekend. I was on campus driving back to my dorm to get something before the party. She was driving from the back of the dorm from seeing her boyfriend.
I flagged her down. She put the car in reverse. I asked for her name and what she was doing. She was blushing as she said leaving my boyfriend dorm. I said “oh ok you got a boyfriend. Well I’m not gone bother you.” Then I drove off.
I could’ve got her number if I wanted to 😉 otherwise why did she reverse 🤷🏾♂️ I let her make it.
The next night I was leaving the club early to go to the movies because I’ve never been the club type guy. As I was walking down the street behind the club we ran into each other. As we passed by each other and it was just us back there, we stopped looked back at each other and just laughed. It was “like hey!!! I remember you.” I shook my head and just walked off while we both laughed but didn’t speak a word. We just looked and smiled at each other.
Never saw her again that year. One whole year later I was at a party with my roommates. I always told them don’t walk off without me or I get bored and have to go talk to somebody. What did they do? They left me. A few minutes later I look to my right and I see her sitting down. I remembered seeing that face a long time ago so I walked up to her and we started talking. We talked for the rest of the night. I walked her outside to change her shoes and she gave me her phone number.
We talked on the phone for a while but she didn’t want to come spend time with me because I wasn’t her type. I was “too nice”. The nerve of her right? I wasn’t the loud guy in the center acting hard. I told her the loudest guy in the room is actually the weakest guy in the room. And that’s what she was use to 😉.
3. Who was interested first?
I was interested in getting to know her, but she was first to want a relationship. When we were talking during the spring I told her I didn’t want a relationship and she was fine with that. Guess mostly because I wasn’t her type anyway. We started talking everyday during the summer. The following spring break she drove down to my hometown to see me before I went to Florida for spring break. Look at that; I went from not her type to her driving 4 hours to see me because I left for a week. And then had the nerve to call me when I’m on my way to Panama City for Spring Break talking about she want us to be together. Really, when I’m headed out for Spring Break?! You just trying to lock me down before I get out here with these women lol. I told her we’ll talk about it when I get back.
4. One obstacle
We’ve faced a few obstacles. No obstacle bigger than almost getting a divorce and feeling like we couldn’t communicate with each other. Sleeping in different rooms for months, not touching each other, barely talking. It was during that time that I found myself reading my bible more consistently than ever. I was taking focus off my wife and turning it to the Bible. I had my biggest bible streak back then. But during that time, all that reading was God molding me and showing me why I couldn’t leave our marriage. It was him showing us how to make our marriage work. It was during that time that I came up with the family plan to accomplish the vision I had for my family. The family plan is what kept our marriage together. I have that inside this app for everyone.
It was during this time we started communication exercises and learned how to effectively communicate with each other. At first when we would argue we would just say “we don’t know how to communicate with each other.” We would say that, but we would never put in the work to learn how to communicate with each other. How can a person do something they have never studied to do? So we started learning, practicing and role playing communication exercises. We have those here inside the app for everyone. Inside the family plan we made a vow on our communication. Not only with ourselves but our kids.
5. Our piece of advice.
For me I say get in a purpose driven relationship/marriage. When you have a championship you are chasing, it makes the team come together stronger. When a team is losing they are dysfunctional, don’t want to be part of the team and don’t care. When a team is chasing a championship they give it their all. Arguments become about winning the purpose not winning the argument and you show up for each other because the goal(purpose) is bigger than the individual. So understand your job on this field of play (earth) is to win at whatever God created you to do. Get a partner who is committed to winning at the purpose your family is created for. Hence, purpose driven marriages.
One other thing I have to say. There is nothing we have that we didn’t have to work for. You can’t become a nurse, doctor, lawyer, insurance agent, manager, sales person, or anything without studying. You can’t be a professional athlete without studying playbooks. Companies always invest in trainings to update your skills for the role you are currently in to make you the best at what you do. How is it that we think we can become husbands and wives without studying and obtaining the skills necessary to perform in the role? You have to invest time, effort, and money into your marriage. Investing money in the marriage is way more beneficial than paying for the wedding.
1. Find the purpose of your company (marriage)
2. Hire marry someone who can help accomplish your company’s mission statement (someone who can help you accomplish the purpose of your marriage)
3. Put in the work (just like companies invest in their employees, invest in your marriage)
6. Why this picture?
This is my favorite picture because of her smile. Me being me making her laugh even at a time that wasn’t the best in our life I could still make her smile like this. This describes us because I’m always saying or doing something crazy to make her laugh.
7. How has God impacted our relationship?
In every way possible. In every way I mentioned above. When we were ready to get a divorce, we were too broke to split lol and it was honestly the position we were suppose to be in because divorce was not where God wanted us to go. If we would’ve had all the money we wanted we probably would’ve went through with the divorce. But he needed us to be broke enough that we couldn’t leave each other and we would turn to him in our time of loneliness and depression. During that time he molded us and showed us what we needed to make it work.
Think about that. Most people when you go through things you turn to partying, drinking, drugs or different partners etc. You know, having a good time. It’s understandable. You are doing things to make yourself feel better in the moment, but those things are what hurt you in the long run. Those things take your focus away from God who is the only one that can truly heal you in those dark depressing times.
It was because I didn’t turn to partying my troubles and pain away that I was able to spend undivided attention with God and he grew me into the husband I needed to be. In our single years we need to give God our undivided attention so he can mold us into the husbands and wives he intended for us to be.
Now because I turned to him and not partying we have a business that provides for our family. Our family is still together. Our family is happy. We are having fun. These are all side affects of doing God’s purpose. Putting his will before ours. Had I went the other way I would have had fun for the moment but we would be divorce, no business helping others with their marriage, our kids splitting time in different homes, money being divided between households.
So much more. Stay tuned.